Monday, November 4, 2013

I'm done.

I've returned from my self-imposed weeks of seclusion in our garage.

Erm, wait, that's not true... I still have to tidy up and...

Okay, I won't lie, I want to refinish a lovely and sturdy blanket box some friends made us years ago—it's a fabulous piece, but a touch too orange for our floors, and I'm about to plunk a fish tank on top of it, and once that fish tank is 200+ lbs filled with water she ain't going anywhere, so I'm going to get that blanket box looking the way I want it to look well before it's time for that fish tank to be filled...

This blanket box should be a quick sand and stain job, though, not the behemoth of a journey that is the dining set.

She looks pretty from a distance, yes?

Oh, you noticed that that was in present tense and not past tense? Well aren't you observant! Have a cookie!

Yes, this is an ongoing journey. Because apparently I am an amateur who does hack jobs.

No, really. I'll own it.

And as lovely as this set is NOW, and as far as it's come between the before and after, it's definitely, definitely, oh by the power of everything holy and light is nowhere near done.

There. I said it.

Want to know why? Well, I've already told you: I'm an amateur.

This set has been a struggle every step of the way.

Before: The state in which I purchased this 10 piece set. Deplorable, yes?
You name it, something came up in every goddamn step that made me want to take our hammer and bang myself in the head. It was covered in scratches, water damage, and the hack sanding job of the previous owners; had multiple extra (and invisible!) screws holding chair cushions, required an insane amount of hand sanding (see latticework chair backs), discovered I'd let the pre-stain conditioner dry too long (so I opted against sanding and staining again—like anyone who's not a sucker for punishment), and ultimately had polyurethane dripping everywhere, only to discover that the particle board used for upholstering chair seats didn't want to take screws and reattach.


I fought construction, wet and cold weather, and now have a peeling tabletop.

This polyurethane hasn't set properly, and parts of the table top are peeling already. Part of this is due to the insane amount of construction going on; it was quite literally impossible to clear all dust and debris from the surface of the table before putting poly on it, so we are left with miniscule bumps.

So what's the verdict? Looks lovely, doesn't it?

That's a six-year-old for scale. It's a big, large, stupendously huge set.

And really, I have two, seven kids using this table on a daily basis. I'm no dummy. They're going to be picking at that peeling poly in no time, and with the mind numbing honour of thieves no one will know who did it.

I already know it won't be Minette, as her "feed me" complaints remind me every morning how much I wish cats had opposable thumbs.


So. What am I to do?

Well, the first step is to not care.


I'm not going to care. We're going to use this table, and enjoy this table, and when Mother Nature once again settles on half decent weather for Canada (I'm ball-parking April, May at the latest), then I'll be enlisting Mr Lannis to help me drag this behemoth back to the garage, where I will sand down the tabletop and try again.

Because I'm nothing if not crazy, stubborn, persistent.

Of course, this is probably totally some kind of cosmic euphemism I'm missing entirely... something something the universe is kicking me right in my perfectionism blah blah blah...

Again: whatever. I'll try again. Later.

The tricky thing between now and then will be somehow gaining the ability to ignore the will-be-crumbling state of this tabletop.

I'm done. Done caring, and done tackling this table.

For now.


Place mats. I'm gonna need lots of place mats...


  1. Oh dear. And we were all so excited to see you had finished it too. At least it looks pretty, right?

  2. I know, I know. After all this work, yes... not done. :/

    It's sad, but I refuse to live in denial and besides, it's a good exercise in patience--peeling poly is not going to affect anything else in my life, so I can wait, and be thankful I don't have bigger problems, yes? :)

  3. Very true. Waiting is hard though.